really?

I haven't been this insecure and this unsettled since freshman year...in high school. I haven't been this lonely and bored with life until I got here. I liked being in my little niche back home. I'll admit I was complacent, but I still had perspective. I don't know where I'm going with this. I just want it to be Christmas.

I'll be the bigger person, it's okay, you don't have to.

HEY!

I watched Twilight tonight. Don't attack me, but I liked it. I was staring at Kristen Stewart the whole time...STOCK.

Kim is cute. I like her sense of style. I laugh the most with Paloma, Brittany, and Kim. They're indie lovers. It's...home. Heh.

What happened to the stereotype that only lesbians wore flannel? It's like a rite of passage. A rite of passage I have yet to experience. BUT SOON! Hey, Kristen Stewart wears flannel, does that mean something? Ugh. I'm ridiculous.

"Steve, you look like the one on the bottom in that cowboy movie....?!"

Meiko.

Go to 1:32. The chinese dude is my freakin' uncle. HA.



I get a Rachael Yamagata vibe from her. I love it. Plus she's pretty.






I've always ignored the fact that I do that. There is no way italy ever cared about me as much as I cared for her.

I'm too stubborn to change.

___

Boys smell stupid. They try and put on cologne but it doesn't mesh with their deodorant which already smells shitty so its just a whole mess of too much testosterone. -_-

Going up to Nor Cal for Thanksgiving. That should be fun =].

listen

I'm going to own you!!!

FUCK SHIT.

This movie makes me feel like a kitten rolling in a quaintly embroidered, soft wool blanket.

.......I just want to shower with a window so I can feel a breeze!!!!!!!

<(^-^<) (>^-^)>

The Twilight Premiere was at Westwood right by UCLA. Some of my friends and I were walking back from Best Buy when we passed by.

Kristen Stewart is beaaaautiful. It's ridic how perfect she is to me. Random. Anyway. I'm probably going to watch Twilight just because of her.

......haha gaaaay.

I've been giving myself pep talks for this precise moment. I think I'm ready. Maybe. I definitely want to be ready. Pfffffffffffft.

___

Santa Monica's sunset is fuckin' beautiful. It made me so damn giddy.
Good times.

We ran into a Vote No on Prop. 8 rally. So many gay people. So much happy.
I really really want to go to Pride in the Spring.

This lady in Micheal's told Jeff and I to "Shut up" because we were singing Tong Hua. Probably because we were singing in Chinese. Yo, really?

I guess its retaliation for when the people at the Chinese store called Jaynee and her Dad white bitches.

Math midterm tomorrow. o_O

MELODICAS!!!!!!!!!

____

I really hate dorms. I can't make it feel like home here, it's impossible. Every time I walk in my room it's cold and damp. Someone's always here. My window faces a walkway and more dorms. Joy.

I need a comfy couch to lay on and to watch tv. I want to be able to stumble through the apartment to get some OJ when I'm thirsty at the middle of night. Such trivial things to want. But! I need them!

yeah, yeah.

Yo. Florida, Arizona AND California?
I was upset by the fact that Florida passed amendment two, but I wasn't quite as surprised by that as I was when it was announced in California. San Francisco is here for godsake. ......Oh, the irony.
People rushed to get married before Tuesday's vote. Rushed to get married. Nobody should have to do that. Fuck that. Same-sex marriages threaten family values my ass. I'll freaking show you how to have "traditional" family.

Well, at least the pro-lifers didn't win.

It's getting colder here. I need someone to keep me warm.
Night.

I miss Ivan, Joni, AND GIO BASTANTE.